With the launch of Good Divorce Week, we are going to post our five top tips this week, with a daily blog to guide you through the key steps you need to take. Make sure you are following Silk Family Law, so that you don’t miss out…

MONDAY | Assemble Your Team

A divorce is renowned as being one of the most stressful experiences a person can go through, and yet, life does not stop while parties divorce and resolve the issues related to their finances and children. Therefore, it is important to ensure that you have the right team around you to assist you through this time. At the outset, think about who you would seek to involve. For example, in addition to a lawyer, do you need any experts such as accountants to value a business or a chartered surveyor to value properties? Think about what approach you want to adopt – collaborative (if it is likely to be an amicable divorce) or is it the case that your lawyer needs to be robust to potentially deal with a spouse who will attempt to “hide” assets. It is helpful for your lawyer to know at the outset, what approach is most likely to achieve the right outcome for you.

You will need to have support around you from your friends and family. Your lawyer will often be a good support, but a personal approach from your friends/family is invaluable. However, be aware that their advice will come from their own experiences and, while well intended, may not correlate with your own situation or the dynamics of your relationship or your legal standing, which ultimately is how claims will be determined. As such, use your solicitor to obtain legal advice and guidance. They will be viewing your situation from a professional distance, but in your interests.

Think about if there are people you don’t want to be involved in the separation process, there may be elderly or vulnerable persons in your life or the other party’s life who you or they would want not to have to be informed of the process while it is ongoing. Try to ensure there is parity in your approach. Any information about the process which is provided to children should always be in suitable terms and, ideally, the narrative, agreed in advance.

It is not uncommon for the process to impact on a person’s physical and/or mental health and therefore, seeking advice from a GP can be an additional appropriate support. There are also divorce coaching services and counsellors specialising in divorce.